Good communication is mostly about being specific and non-accusing. Describe the behaviour, the effect, and the request: 'When plans change last minute, I feel dismissed. Can we agree to text as soon as something shifts?'
Part 01
The lesson
Avoid 'always' and 'never' — they invite a debate about accuracy instead of a conversation about the issue. Also choose your timing: almost nothing important should be raised while one person is walking out of the door.
Reflection
Questions to sit with
- 01When you are hurt, do you say so, or do you go quiet and make the other person guess?
- 02What did you learn about love from the home you grew up in, and which parts do you want to keep?
- 03When did you last apologise without adding an explanation?
Put it into practice
Action points
- 01For one week, ask 'do you want help or do you want me to listen?' before responding to any problem someone brings you.
- 02Write down the last three arguments you had. Identify the real underlying issue in each, rather than the surface topic.