Discipline means teaching, not punishing. The aim is a child who eventually governs themselves, which means they need to understand the reason, not just fear the consequence.
Part 01
The lesson
Be calm, consistent and proportionate. Consequences agreed in advance work far better than ones invented in anger, and a father who shouts constantly eventually finds that shouting stops working.
Part 02
In practice
'You threw the controller, so it's put away until tomorrow' — stated once, calmly, and followed through — teaches more than ten minutes of raised voice.
Reflection
Questions to sit with
- 01What will your children say about you when they are forty?
- 02When did your child last see you admit you were wrong?
- 03Is your family managing your moods?
Put it into practice
Action points
- 01Spend 30 uninterrupted minutes with your child today — no phone, their choice of activity.
- 02Ask your child what they think makes a good father. Listen without correcting the answer.