Presence is attention, not proximity. A father in the room with his phone in his hand is not present, and children read this accurately from a very young age.
Part 01
The lesson
Protect small, reliable pockets: the drive to school, twenty minutes before bed, Saturday morning. Predictable attention is worth far more than occasional big outings.
Part 02
In practice
Ask your child a question about their world and ask two follow-ups. Most conversations with children end because the adult stopped after the first answer.
Reflection
Questions to sit with
- 01What will your children say about you when they are forty?
- 02When did your child last see you admit you were wrong?
- 03Is your family managing your moods?
Put it into practice
Action points
- 01Spend 30 uninterrupted minutes with your child today — no phone, their choice of activity.
- 02Ask your child what they think makes a good father. Listen without correcting the answer.